I don’t have allergies to anything edible.
Some of my old outfits are coming back in style.
I just found some change in the couch.
Celebrity gossip has gotten un-boring again.
I’m getting the Pauline Kael book for my birthday.
I stopped drinking diet soda.
Jack’s 99-cent store just got a stash of gourmet vegetable medleys.
The Republicans are really fucking up.
I’ve finally gotten used to wearing 3-D glasses.
I don’t lose gloves as often as I used to.
I was right when I said the Golden Globes weren’t really mad at Ricky Gervais. That was all PR baloney. He’s back. I like being right.
My sink was fixed.
I just got an uncut copy of Born Innocent with Linda Blair.
I can be openly gay next time I’m in the military.
I’ve trained everyone around me to treat me like gold.
And I have you, dear readers!
Thank YOU, kittens, for bringing your arsenal of witty repartee here every day, and have a wonderful Thanksgiving filled with gratitude and dead poultry.