By now, you have certainly heard about the lovely Los Angeles woman who pepper-sprayed her fellow shoppers on Black Friday, over discounted Xboxes. Or the hot deals on cheap yoga pants that inspired a punching match at Victoria’s Secret in Pennsylvania. Or the Arizona grandfather who was bodyslammed and bloodied, after his grandson got trampled. Or maybe you just heard about all the rest of the father-tasering, food-court gunplay, and consumer nonsense that took place on November 25! But did you hear the one about the Wal-Mart waffle mini-riot?
This one’s pretty special because it features shoppers behaving like looters over a stack of $2 waffle makers. They squeal like pigs, plow into one another like linebackers, and look very much like maggots attacking dead flesh. But the highlight is the adorable young lady who’s so determined to purchase four–count them, four–$2 waffle makers, that instead of pepper-spray, she seems to have employed her bum to keep away rivals. And it works!