How to Make Iced Tea, and an Analysis


This strange video has been sloshing around the Internet for a year or two, but it was new to me, and maybe you haven’t seen it either. What makes it so wonderful? “Some people have asked me how I make my iced tea,” Steve Sutton says in measured tones — and off he goes.

Is it the length and tedious detail? The recounting of obvious steps? The idea that the guy may just pull out an ax at any moment and begin swinging it at you? Or the thought that gradually dawns on you that this really isn’t the right way to make tea.

Or the charming details, like the view out his window, featuring bare trees and a squirrel. Or the view inside his refrigerator, or the realization that his dirty dishes consist of a single plastic cup.

If you figure it out (or who he is — a cursory search failed to reveal, though he has several other videos up) please tell us. We’re convinced that, as far as anal-retentive personalities go, this guy’s the real deal. At the start of the video, look at the neatly stacked file-card boxes behind him, every part of his world is perfectly arranged. Ditto with the kitchen as it’s slowly revealed, detail by detail.

Anyway, whoever you are Steve Sutton, thank you! You may be the new auto-Hitchcock. “Congratulations, you’ve just made a pitcher of sweet tea,” he says, carefully emphasizing every syllable. “Enjoy your tea!” Now go hide under the covers.

Thanks to Chase employee Barb Konfuser N for the link.