For Only $69, You Can Ride the Juggalo Express


Thing about Insane Clown Posse? Their grind is unstoppable. They’ve outlasted more novelty cycles than Spencer Gifts, completely independently, and with this sheer stubborn unwillingness to quit, they keep forging on, as cartoonishly corny and fastidiously “wig-splitting” as ever. So even when it seems like they’ve exhausted all the possible press they could, milked the weirdest collaborations for all they’re worth, all the sudden, they reappear with another goofy greenscreen infomercial, advertising something new and “fresh” for the Juggalos. The newest and freshest development: a New Year’s Eve Juggalo gala (?) in Worcester, Massachusetts.

Even more ridiculous? There’s a party bus heading up there from New York earlier in the day, leaving from the Hammerstein Ballroom, and returning in the next morning’s wee hours. Tickets are, ahem, $69.

This won’t be the Juggalo Express’s inaugural voyage. Rocks Off, Jake Szufnarowski’s gleefully debauched independent NY-based promoting business, arranged for a rented bus to the Gathering of the Juggalos earlier this year, which was, by all of Buzzfeed staff’s accounts, quite an experience. Such an experience that Rocks Off has arranged for another bus with an Insane Clown Posse-related destination, leaving 34th and 8th at 2:00pm. The bus is BYOB and the $69 party-bus fee doesn’t include the $29.50 price of admission.

Sounds great, but why would anyone on Earth want to ride this bus to Worcester, Massachusetts and back in less than 24 hours? Simply put: “So we can do the driving and you can do the drinking!” They do make a good point, even if you’re just willing to revel in the extreme absurdity of the circumstances:

We are running an air-conditioned, bathroom-equipped, sound system, TV screen-rockin party bus from NYC to and from Worcester, Massachusetts, so you don’t need to worry about finding a ride, staying sober, dealing with the scumbags on public transportation (or the crowded-ass, un-airconditioned, non-bathroom equipped or sound system, TV-rockin shuttle buses back to the NJT station after the show), or even learning where the hell “Worcester” actually is.  Really, all you’ve gotta do is buy a ticket, show up, stumble into and out of the venue, and we’ll take care of the rest.

Let it be known that Insane Clown Posse is not performing on New Year’s Eve, though Violent J and Shaggy 2 Dope will be hosts. Performances include Juggalo personalities most humans have never heard of (Blaze Ya Dead Homie, the Dayton Family, weed chanteuse Ill. E. Gal), and a few very exciting matches of Juggalo Championshit (no sic) Wrestling. The event’s theme, as summed up by Violent J: “We’re all gonna die anyways, 2012!”

Tickets, should you be so inclined, are available here.

Watch the official New Year’s Eve infomercial

More NYC New Year’s Eve options here

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