If you happen to be strolling into the Fulton Street McDonald’s late at night (because that’s the only time you eat fast food, right?), you may be shocked to discover that the soda fountain is missing. It isn’t your drunken state. They aren’t pouring your bubbly from behind the counter. And there’s no more lever-enabled stream to be had.
Rub the booze from your eyes and look closely — you’ll notice something new flanking the condiments counter of this South Street Seaport fast-food center. Soda vending machines. Brilliant!
Play with the touch screen to toggle through all of your carbonated, or flavored-water, options. Want Dasani water? Lemon flavored? Lime? Into Coca-Cola? Now is it vanilla that you crave, caffeine-free? Caffeine-free, diet, or caffeine-free diet? The choices are endless. It’s almost overwhelming.
A local rep, a/k/a the guy who sweeps the floor at midnight, assured us that this addition was new and would be in all New York locations soon. Other machines have been spotted at the Lincoln Square and Koreatown locations. Dubbed the “Freestyle,” this new technology is bound to change the face of soda drinking.
For a demonstration of the McDonald’s Freestyle, click through to this YouTube video “unless you’re some sort of loser.”
“His cheeks, colored by a network of ruptured blood vessels, were formed by a coalescence of hanging globules, beneath which the double fold of his chin melted into his neck. And his skull was strung with cords of fat.”