Your Weekly Schedule At XL: Here It Is


XL is the new gay dance club previewing tomorrow, then having a “grand opening” Friday, then having “the grand opening Saturday,” if you catch the subtle difference.

And since dance clubs are as hard to come by as deli coffee these days, you might as well start scheduling every single night there.

Fortunately, they have a different event planned for each evening of the week, for the rest of your godforsaken life.

To wit:

*Twisted Cabaret Mondays (which also seem to be called Vintage Soul Mondays) featuring Shoshana Bean live with her band.

*Play Hard on Tuesdays. (No, I have no idea. You figure it out.)

*On Wednesdays, there’s Bunny & Bianca in Hot Mess (“Glamour. Comedy. Scandals”).

*Thursday nights, Susanne Bartsch and Kenny Kenny invite you to the wild and wacky 42nd. Wear three headdresses, but no drop earrings. Less is more.

*On Fridays, the long-running Rockit bash will end up in your pockit.

*Don’t forget XL Saturdays with DJ Manny Lehmann and other chesty treats.

*On Sunday, there’s Christina Visca’s Classic Tea — and no, they don’t serve English Breakfast.

*And Sunday evenings house D3Tour Sundays (“A tour through the Latin world.” Hola!).

Plus there are weekly cabaret events at XL featuring the likes of Jessye Normous and Kristine W.

That only leaves Tuesday afternoon, when I will sleep with cucumbers on my eyes and probably elsewhere, too.