New York

Gossiping Is Forbidden By The Bible!


We’re all going to hell, kids!

And in my case it’s OK, because a whole slew of washed-up sitcom and sketch-comedy “stars” have said I’m going there already, in a first-class seat.

Acording to this huff post piece countering smarmy little Kirk Cameron‘s bible-backed anti-gay rhetoric, there’s a whole bunch of behavior that’s forbidden by the good book, stuff that the haters tend to ignore as they go about their merry gay-baiting.

For example:

*Tattoos (Oh, no! Cher’s going to hell!)

*Getting remarried after a divorce (Oh, no! Cher’s going to hell!)

*Eating a ham sandwich (Oy.)

*And like I said, gossiping! (Anyone who talks about Cher is going to hell!)

Apparently, in Leviticus, it flat-out says, “Thou shalt not go up and down as talebearers among the people.

“Neither shalt thou stand against the blood of thy neighbors: I am the LORD.”

Holy shit, I’m scared! No more gossiping for me!! Ever!

But can I at least occasionally have a ham and cheese omelette?

Most Popular