New York

Join Me In Not Wearing Green For St. Patrick’s Day


Wear some horrific shade of black, brown, or gray to make a statement.

And that statement will be:

I’m not going along with your festivities and acting like this is a day for merry-making when open gays are still banned from being represented in the parade!

Until Saturday’s event catches up with the last century, sexuality-wise, I don’t see why we need to validate it, celebrate it, and act like it’s so hunky-dory that we’re going to go along with their color scheme, down to the green vomit after a few too many beers.

I’m not saying you should lock yourself in the house — just that you shouldn’t act like you’re a willing participant since so many people are criminally unwelcome there.

My big dilemma is that a friend is having his big annual St. Patty’s Day party, but that’s mainly because his name happens to be Patty.

In any case, I will make my obligatory appearance, but I will not wear green, except for the boogers hanging out of my nose in protest.

And I will not smile or act like I’m having the slightest bit of fun, not even in unguarded moments.

Kindly do the same.

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