New York

Rick Santorum’s Top Six Anti-Gay Marriage Bites


Thanks to reporter Rex Wockner for the lineup.

And by the way I’m leaving out all the “man on dog” stuff because they’ve gotten enough airplay. Give some other hate bites a chance!

*A napkin is not a paper towel, metaphysically.

*Calling a glass of water beer does not make the glass of water beer.

*Calling same-sex marriage a marriage would be like calling a cup of tea a basketball.

*It’s like going out and saying, “That tree is a car.” Well, the tree’s not a car. A tree’s a tree.

*Outlaw gay marriage nationwide.

*Well, then, what about three-man marriage?

This would all be mildly hilarious if it weren’t so freakin’ sad.

Oh, well. Santorum’s campaign is going down like a gay husband on his honeymoon anyway.

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