I was just knighted by the Imperial Court of New York at their annual Night of 1,000 Gowns gala at the Marriott Marquis, the honor accorded to me by departing Emperor Vanity Society and Empress Pepperica Swirl.
I wore the above stunning ensemble put together by Christian Freedom (which photographer Derk Storm feels qualifies me for a role in the next Twilight flick).
So all you peons will officially address me as Sir Michael from now on! You hear?
But wait a royal minute.
Considering the fact that my previous official name was Her Imperial Highness Puddins the Cat, you will now call me Sir Michael Her Imperial Highness Puddins the Cat Musto.
Or maybe just Sir Open Mike Night.
Or perhaps Sir Bitch.
Anyway, congrats to me, Johnny Dynell, and Chi Chi Valenti for being suddenly titled and medallioned.
And all hail the new Emperor Ritz Kraka and Empress Witti Repartee.
These two Krakas will guide us gently into the long good knight.