Dark Shadows Has Problems


Naturally, Tim Burton has brought an extremely vivid look to his adaptation of Dark Shadows, based on the ’70s soap opera about a vampire who’s only marginally weirder than the people around him.

The film also has a terrific soundtrack featuring period pieces by T. Rex, the Carpenters, and other odd throwbacks.

But it’s tonally uneven, going from a soulfully beautiful beginning that sets up Barnabas Collins’ plight, then thrusting us into sitcom-like fish-out-of-water antics, then wanting us to care about Angelique (Eva Green) coming back in full witchy mode and going up against Barnabas for one more conflict.

There are strong bits here and there, but also boring stretches and some head scratching moments.

Johnny Depp has the Barnabas bangs, but mainly registers as a floating blank who emits arch, self-consciously cute things (about “birthing hips” for example), then floats somewhere else.

The original show never tried to be cute.

Angelique is sometimes called Angie, and she even looks like Angelina Jolie at times.

Is this Depp’s revenge on The Tourist?

Maybe–but it might also be Burton’s retaliation.

After all, Angelique seems to be styled to look even more like Tim’s ex, Lisa Marie!