News & Politics

Bath Salt Apocalypse: AG Eric Schneiderman Hits New York Head Shops With Lawsuits

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There’s a new hero in the ongoing Bath Salt Apocalypse: New York Attorney General Eric Schneiderman.

Apparently recognizing that synthetic drugs like bath salts bring out a person’s inner-cannibal, Schneiderman has filed 12 lawsuits against head shop retailers across New York for violating the state’s labeling laws by selling the designer drugs under the guise that they’re merely “herbal incenses.” However, these “herbal incenses” just happen to have been linked to dozens of violent (oftentimes cannibalistic) assaults across the country.

Further reading on the Bath Salt Apocalypse:

-Naked Georgia Man Rambles About Tupac and Biggie Before Threatening To Eat Cop
-Louisiana Man Gnaws Neighbor’s Face
-Utica Woman Threatens To Eat Cop While High On Bath Salts
-Miami Zombie Eats Homeless Man’s Face

Schneiderman says undercover investigations revealed that employees
at the stores — which span from Buffalo to Long Island — were
illegally selling the drugs, which have innocuous names that give users
the impression that they’re harmless. But they’re not — as we mentioned, they often turn people into cannibals.

In May, a senior investigator from the AG’s Office made four separate
investigative visits to two head shops in the Rochester area,
both named “Look ah Hookah.” The agent bought
two variations of the “powerful smokable substance K2” labeled “Zombie
Matter” and “Voodoo.” According to Schneiderman, both
of the drugs were described by a clerk as “herbal incenses.”

On a
second trip to one of the stores, the investigator got his hands on
other synthetic drugs like Fly Agaric Mushrooms, a well-known
psychedelic, and Salvia. He also bought a bong
recommended by a clerk to be the “best” way to smoke the drug.

On a third trip, the investigator bought “MJ Blueberry
Aromatic Potpourri” and “kratom” an “extremely potent plant with
opiate-like effects.” According to Schneiderman, the drugs were advertised and labeled as
“potpourri” or “incense,” and the agent again purchased a smoking device at the
recommendation of the store’s clerk.

Technically, these drugs are legal. However, federal and state laws require that “all consumer
commodities, at a minimum, be labeled to describe net contents, identity
of the product, and the name and place of business of the product’s
manufacturer, packer, and distributor.”

In other words, if you’re going to sell drugs that potentially turn
people into cannibals, calling it “incense” and then recommending they
buy a bong from which to smoke it isn’t gonna fly.

“The proliferation of illegal synthetic drugs has become a national
crisis. In Rochester and across the state, our undercover investigations
have revealed the widespread sales and promotion of bath salts and
other dangerous drugs that are destroying people’s lives,” Schneiderman
says. “We discovered that head shop employees were giving tutorials on
how to use dangerous intoxicants. With today’s actions, we are fighting
back to control this crisis, and ensure that the days of profiting off
the illegal sale of these dangerous drugs are over.”

Normally, we wouldn’t be applauding a law enforcement official for
wasting time and money fighting the “war on drugs.” However, synthetic drugs are
fucking terrifying — again, they apparently turn people into cannibals.

Maja Lundborg-Gray, M.D. at Samaritan Medical Center in Watertown,
says the violence associated with synthetic drugs is unprecedented.

“There is a completely new level of violence and unpredictability
associated with these patients. In some instances, hospital staff have
been diverted from helping other patients in order to assist in securing
and stabilizing designer drug users,” Lundborg-Gray says.

The following stores are named in the lawsuit:

Pavilion International in Buffalo and Commack

Look Ah Hookah in Rochester (2 locations)

Twisted Headz in Syracuse

Trip on the Wild Side II in Watertown

Rolling Fire Glassworks in Binghamton

Goodfellas Alternative Smoke Shop in Utica

20 Below/ This and That in Plattsburgh

Shining Star Enterprises in Albany

Giggles in Poughkeepsie

Village Sensations in Nanuet

East Coast Psychedelics in Oceanside and Commack

Daze Smoke Shop in Baldwin

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