The 1962 Granny Guignol classic Whatever Happened To Baby Jane? is being remade by Walter Hill, and it’s time to line up two stars who are over the hill to play the parts.
You know the drill.
Jane is a nutjob who’s stuck in her cutesy-pie kiddie routine and is so adorable except that she viciously holds her sister captive and tries to serve her dead animals all day.
And Blanche is disabled and helpless, completely victimized by the demented Jane, though flashbacks prove it’s she who’s the real c word by a long shot and deserving of every last rat entree.
The resulting flick is scary and demented and degrading and pathetic and I’ve watched it 117 times.
So here are my casting choices for the remake.
Any of these pairings would equal huge smash, and not just in HK:
Madonna and Lady Gaga
Betty White and Doris Roberts
Julia Roberts and Charlize Theron
The Olsen twins
The Fanning sisters
Maggie Smith and Shirley MacLaine
Barbra Streisand and Liza Minnelli
Grace Slick and Tina Turner
Tyler Perry and Diahann Carroll
Tom Cruise and John Travolta