New York

Calvin Klein’s Ex Boy Toy Is Writing A Tell-All! Here Are My Thoughts


Remember when I wrote that Calvin Klein was nuts to throw a gala party toasting his love for ex-porn player Nick Gruber (a writeup which resulted in a hailstorm of criticism, everyone calling me a horrible Puritan who was holding back progress)?

Please. I’m all for people loving whoever they want–within reason–but when you start to act as if something like this is the real thing, you’re embarrassing yourself.

Have your late-life crisis in private!

Make any arrangement you want, but don’t invite VIP names to celebrate it.

And I was right.

The couple took a break, then Gruber was arrested for assault and cocaine possession this April, and after rehab, he was sentenced to 20 days of community service.

And now he’s writing a book that threatens to unveil seamy details about his life with Calvin.

Are you happy, Cal?

Do you see what you got yourself into?

After even reportedly paying for the kid’s rehab?

Anyway, I’m going to avoid cheap jokes like “Shouldn’t Nick read a book?”

Instead, I’m going to urge him to not come off like a trashy spoilsport.

Be a little kind with Calvin, hon.

I mean, sort of like Katie Holmes, you knew what kind of thing you were getting into and you certainly milked it, relied on it, and let it add to your resume (while also making Calvin very happy, at least until the fuckups).

Why not walk away from this arrangement with a little class rather than throwing dirt just out of revenge or opportunism?

But either way, we’ll definitely read it!

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