FINAL COUNTDOWN

Perhaps you’ve already read Daily Show “resident expert” John Hodgman’s That Is All, which explains the horrors headed our way tonight (do you know about “The Blood Wave”?) and how mayonnaise and jars of urine might be the only way to survive. Crazy? Find out when he leads a countdown to midnight at the Bell House with the appropriately surreal sounds of multi-instrumentalist Cynthia Hopkins. Or hit Hodgman’s early show at 6:30 and then head over to Joe’s Pub to see Zumanity star Joey Arias, who, instead of hiding in an underground bunker somewhere, is valiantly putting on a great big, bawdy show with Doveman on piano, the Pixie Harlots, and performance artist Narcissister. We predict the only tough part about tonight will be deciding which show to go to. John Hodgman at 6:30 (early show) and 10 (countdown to midnight), the Bell House, 149 7th Street, Brooklyn, 718-643-6510, $15.

Fri., Dec. 21, 11:30 p.m., 2012