DJ Whoo Kid Thinks Snoop Dogg Should Have Been the New Pope


Editor’s note: In Tweets is Watching, Phillip Mlynar asks local artists questions based solely on the contents of their Twitter timeline.

Last week DJ Whoo Kid helped launch the video for A$AP Ferg’s new track “40 Below,” which also appears on his SXSW Social mixtape. When not granting assists to the A$AP kids, Whoo Kid can be found hosting his Sirius radio show, which he describes as a mix of interviews with “weird crazy white people and hardcore hip-hop.” Here’s Whoo Kid using his timeline to jump into anecdotes about the time 2Pac watched him catch a beating from his dad, sending Common prank birthday presents, and giving out responsible pet ownership tips like training your dog to poop into a plastic bag.

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How did the collaboration with A$AP Ferg come about?
When artists come on my show I always demand a new record — I did that with A$AP Rocky, with Wiz Khalifa — then we film like a little video for it. The song with A$AP Ferg got so crazy! It was kinda weird ’cause I was doing a Biggie tribute show, like a remembrance show, but for some reason out of all the records he gave me that one kinda had like a Biggie vibe, like a Notorious B.I.G. flow. He told me it wasn’t mixed or anything but when I heard it I was like, “Yo, this sounds like a Notorious B.I.G. flow!” He was talking about life and all this crazy stuff. It was like the realest shit.

What’s the story behind the photos of the big dog attacking you?
That’s my lab, man. My dog died last year so I went and bought a yellow lab and I called the dog Tyga ’cause I like the rapper Tyga. I told Tyga when I was in Vegas and he started laughing. I thought it was a good dog name. But he grew too big. I don’t know what happened the other day on Instagram but I was calling myself the Nigga Pope and all of a sudden the dog started attacking me! He just jumped at me and started biting me. I was just laughing. Once I called myself the Nigga Pope he started attacking me. Maybe he likes the Pope? I don’t know.

Is he a well-trained dog?
Nah, he’s not trained, he’s still a pup. I still have another two more years to go. He attacks like the mailman and the UPS man. Me and 50 Cent, we have private barbers, so when the barber comes to my house to cut my hair he attacks the barber. He’s just playful and doesn’t understand his size. He’s still a puppy. I was banging some veterinarian in Vegas and she was like, “You’re gonna have another two, three years to go ’cause he’s a yellow lab.”

Do you have any tips for anyone else with a very big dog?
Man, you got to really watch your fingers. I have a really heavy chain for him, like a pitbull chain, and if you have your fingers caught in there and he speeds off, it could snap my finger. He’s so heavy, he’s unaware. I was trying to grab him so he can stay still and he almost ripped my finger off. You really have to be careful with those heavy chains for dogs. I don’t think a lot of people have figured that out. If you have a pitbull they don’t really go jumping like that, but labs are so playful. You could dislocate your arm if you don’t know what’s going on! But they’re lovely animals and he’s very loyal and he’s always licking me. I don’t know, maybe he’s homo. Maybe I have a homo dog. He’s always licking my mouth. I don’t know, man.

Do you pick up his poop when you walk him?
I have to, I live in a white neighborhood! Everyone’s like watching. When you’re the only black guy in a white neighborhood, everyone knows that you had the dog that shitted here and there. I always pick up his shit. What’s cool is, I don’t want to pick it up so I put the bag under his ass and he shits in the bag. So you put the supermarket bag under the dog’s ass. Even my last dog did the same thing. When he goes to take a shit, I put the bag under his ass, that way I don’t have to touch it. I hate touching shit. And if he has diarrhea, I’m out! I am not picking up liquid shit.

You mentioned the Pope. Which rappers would make a good Pope?

Probably Snoop Dogg ’cause he’s known worldwide and he’s been a pimp and now he has Bob Marley in him so he’s spiritual. He’s done everything you can do: He’s smoked every blunt and seen all types of gods, he’s seen Allah, he’s seen whatever god you want to pick. He’s performed for the Queen. He should be the Nigga Pope!

Did you get Common a present for his birthday?
Common doesn’t need any presents any more from me ’cause I always make fun of him and Serena [Williams] breaking up. I always used to send him a big pic of Serena’s ass ’cause I know he misses that ass. He says he’s over that but I know he wants that ass. They sell these fake asses at the sex shop, and I knew he was at this hotel in the city so I was going to send him one. But I refrained from doing that this year. I think this girl he’s with gets a little pissed off about being reminded of Serena. It was good when he was single, ’cause when he was single I know he was wildin’ out but now I think he has a girl or whatever so I’ma keep the fake asses at bay until he breaks up again.

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What’s the worst birthday present you’ve ever received yourself?
A chick gave me a sweater from the M&M store in Times Square. What the fuck am I, a little kid?!

You were tweeting about Biggie the other day. Did you ever get to meet him?

That’s the only artist I never met. 2Pac saw me get whipped by my father when I was young. I had a curfew so I used to hang in front of my house ’cause around the corner Russell Simmons was there with Run-DMC and then a block away was DJ Clue and to the left was Linden Boulevard which was LL Cool J. A whole bunch of rappers would come on my block to get beats from Stretch who also got killed. Back in those days 2Pac was with Digital Underground so when he used to walk up the block he’d have to pass by my house. One day my father was whipping me — I don’t know what I did — and while I was getting whipped 2Pac and Stretch stood there and watched and said, “Damn, that’s fucked up.” Then they walked away. That’s the only connection I got with 2Pac which is fucked up! And I know every other rapper in the industry, never met Biggie but 2Pac saw me get whipped by my Caribbean father. That’s a fucked up story!

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