Today, Time magazine published its annual list of the 140 Best Twitter Feeds (in the world!). The list is full of cultural tastemakers, newshounds and celebrities–but it seems to missing something. That’s right, it’s missing you. You didn’t make the list, despite your tireless dedication to Twitter and the Twitter arts. Put down that bottle of Wild Turkey and your grandfather’s old service revolver; we have some tips on how to get on Time‘s list next year.
All tweets used in this guide were also used by Time as examples of great tweets.
Every tweet should have, at minimum, eight hashtags. Any fewer and you may as well be using a tin can and piece of string to get your message out. It doesn’t matter what words you hashtag, just get the damn hashtags out there and get them out there in bundles. Check out this tweet from Marco Rubio, a Time super-tweeter in the field of #politics:
There is only one savior, and it is not me. #Jesus
— Marco Rubio (@marcorubio) February 7, 2013
He was seven hashtags short, but #Jesus counts for 12 (read the Bible, it’s in there). Now #that’s a #tweet.
Ask Rhetorical Questions
Be like the BBC’s Robert Peston, who was blessed by Time‘s editors as an elite tweeter:
In last 3 months of 2012, 11 UK banks borrowed £9.5bn of cheap money from Bank of Eng’s FLS, & cut lending in UK by £2.4bn. Healthy?
— Robert Peston (@Peston) March 4, 2013
If you ask rhetorical questions, people will follow you because they assume you will eventually answer them. The most important thing, however, is to NEVER ANSWER THE QUESTIONS. Ever. If you answer your own rhetorical questions, your followers will flee you at a record pace and Time‘s expert Twitter judges will throw you to the curb like the rotting sack of garbage you are.
Streamline UR tweets
Tyra Banks gets it, and Time recognizes this:
Excuses will only keep U from being UR fiercest U! twitter.com/tyrabanks/stat…
— Tyra Banks (@tyrabanks) March 13, 2013
Every time U write out full, complete words, UR followers get drowsy and fall asleep. Sleeping followers are a definite NO-NO when it comes to POWER-TWEETING.
Michael Kors is nice. He wants women to have everything. What does he get in return? A spot on Time‘s list.
Women today want it all–comfort, quality and luxury–and they deserve it all!
— Michael Kors(@MichaelKors) March 1, 2013
Make your avatar a picture of you waving your hands around
Look at tweeters Betsey Stevenson and Justin Wolfers, who Time calls the “power-couple of public policy.”
Notice something? That’s right: their hands. In the power-tweeting business, we call that pose the “TEDTalk.” Use it.
Cool tweets, right? WRONG. All these tweets are examples of #social #media inspiring #change through #disruption and #interaction.
Take heed, and maybe next year you will make the list.