A few weeks ago, TV person and spittle-flecked bow-tie-wearer Glenn Beck revealed a shocking truth to a blissfully unaware nation: New York City is well on its way to electing a “radical leftist” named Bill de Blasio as its next mayor.
“New Yorkers may be begging for their benevolent dictator Herr Bloomberg to return,” Beck told his viewers. He then “exposed” de Blasio as a marxist communist socialist Che Guevara-lover who’d once traveled to both Cuba and Nicaragua, and warned that de Blasio is “a violent revolutionary taking over New York City.” (Meanwhile, the actual news is busy covering the fact that de Blasio is now trying very hard to make nice with Wall Street.)
As it turns out, lucky for us, Beck was just getting started with his color commentary of New York politics.
“But why?” you ask. “Why do we have to hear from Glenn Beck at all? Didn’t he move to a bunker in Texas somewhere?” He did, to a rented mansion in Southlake, a posh North Texas suburb. In July, according to our Dallas sister paper, he purchased a 72,000-square-foot studio in a second prosperous North Texas suburb, Las Colinas.
But for the past week, Beck’s been spending a lot of time in New York, attending what he refers to as “top secret meetings” and posting pictures on his Instagram pointing to the Chrysler building. And now he’s suddenly taken a renewed, possibly worrisome interest in New York City politics.
On his radio show this morning, Beck watched footage from Tuesday night’s mayoral debate between de Blasio and Republican candidate Joe Lhota, and offered his apocalyptic pronouncement for what it means for the city: “Yeah, the Communist will win.”
Beck also mock-urged all the staffers at his media company, The Blaze, to come to Texas, warning, “Your life is going to become a living hell in New York. I want you to know clearly: The company has 150,000 square feet of studio space in Texas where the taxes amount to zero, where freedom is running rampant in the streets, instead of people that are crazy, wetting themselves and wanting to stab all people with any kind of a job.”
A few moments later, Beck added that de Blasio’s election would amount to “a communist takeover in New York. And New York, you’re going to get what you deserve. And I hate to say this, but look at what this city is already like compared to what it was five years ago.” (That’s right: de Blasio hasn’t been elected yet, but he’s already ruining the city. Such is the pernicious nature of socialist marxist leftist communism.)
Beck also recounted his time in New York in the ’80s, a bit of a puzzling claim, considering that he doesn’t appear to have lived here then, hopping from Corpus Christi to Louisville to Phoenix to Houston; the closest he came to New York was a gig at a station in New Haven, Connecticut, in 1996. But nonetheless, his memories of New York and how scary it was under Ed Koch are vivid.
“I was in this city, where you were afraid to stop your car in the 1980s,” he said. “You never wanted to stop at a stoplight because there was somebody who was homeless that was brutal, that because you had a car, you owed them. And it started in the 1970s. And they would come and they would squirt water on your car, take a piece of newspaper that was on the floor, wipe it once and then slam on your windshield, ‘Pay up.’ And you just prayed every step of the way, ‘Just don’t let me hit any red lights. Please, please, please don’t let me hit any red lights.’ And if you did, you wanted to be about five or six cars back from the front.”
And that, Beck added, is exactly where New York is headed: on the first communist train back to hell. “This city is going to be an absolute nightmare because they are pitting people against each other. This is the Occupy Wall Street attitude.”
This means he’s not moving back, right? Right?