Statistical Proof That New Yorkers Are A-Holes When Compared With Midwesterners


New evidence confirms what we’ve always known: New Yorkers are the worst. It didn’t take more than five seconds of being outside in last week’s Polar Vortex to realize that going out to get food was not a viable option, so many hungry patrons across the country took to and (now combined delivery superpower Grubhub Seamless) to get their favorite noshes sent to their door — but not all frozen delivery men and women were appreciated equally.

We got in touch with the delivery site, and we learned that while tips did increase in New York City, they only went up 5 percent, putting New York dead last in cold-induced generosity on a list of 11 cities affected by the Polar Vortex. In the Midwest*, where the people are as warm as the pizza is deep, tipping increased significantly. In Detroit and Minneapolis, tipping was more than 15 percent higher than average, and in Chicago, it was more than 14 percent higher.

Let’s take a look at the rest of the cities hit with last week’s cold weather (data courtesy Grubhub Seamless):

Further data shows this is not an isolated incident. In the Groundhog Day Blizzard of 2011, tips in Chicago were more than 14 percent higher than average, while during Winter Storm Nemo in 2013, tips in NYC only reached 7 percent higher than normal. And perhaps not surprisingly, our other Northeastern neighbors have an equally despicable track record for gratuities: In Boston, Winter Storm Nemo produced tips 8 percent higher than average (but, uh, hey, New York, Boston is still beating us at tipping).

So let’s all take a page out of the Midwest’s book, fellow Big Apple dwellers: Next time a natural disaster strikes — and it will (thanks climate change) — think about the guy braving the rain, wind, and snow to bring you your spider rolls.

* We will acknowledge here that the Midwest was significantly colder than New York: -42 degree wind chill in Chicago versus -16 degree wind chill in NYC. But still. Come on.