Bernie Kerik’s MySpace Mood is Determined

Turns out Bernie Kerik is a virgo. He’s 52, 5-10 and Catholic He has 1,059 friends. He likes Nickelback, Lee Greenwood and Toby Keith. And, yes, he’s still flacking for 9/11 Nation.

That’s what you can learn about the indicted former New York City police commissioner, and erstwhile card-carrying member of the “Yes Rudy” contingent on his very own MySpace page.

The backdrop of the page is the cover of his book, “The Lost Son.” Of course, he doesn’t mention that he used detectives to help him with his research, and used photos taken by Police Department photographers. And it’s the same book where he compares the meeting in which Rudy named him police commissioner to a mafia ceremony.

And although Rudy Giuliani has tried in a halting way to distance himself from Kerik, Bernie makes sure we remember their close ties. He includes dozens of pictures on the page of himself and Rudy, and he notes they once partnered in a security company.

Here’s Bernie pointing heroicly at Ground Zero. Here he is sitting with Rudy and the Emir of Qatar. Here he is in Iraq. Here he is talking into two phones at once. Here’s a photo of construction workers spelling out “We Remember” at Ground Zero.

In the alternate reality created by Kerik, there is only 9/11 and “fighting terrorism.” There was no indictment by Bronx District Attorney Robert Johnson, nor was there a guilty plea by Kerik.

And there was no subsequent federal indictment for accepting money from a company seeking city business, lying on a loan application and lying to the feds. Just yesterday a federal judge ordered Kerik to find a new lawyer, ruling that attorney Kenneth Breen had a conflict of interest because he was witness to statements Kerik made to investigators that could constitute a crime.

Kerik repeatedly claimed both to investigators and his lawyers, the opinion says, that he alone paid for the renovations to his apartment. The government contends a private company paid for the work.

At the very start of a lengthy bio, he mentions his nomination by President Bush as Secretary of Homeland Security, but not the wave of negative revelations that forced him to withdraw his name.

Through it all, Bernie seems to have his supporters, at least according to the page. “Bernie, you are gold,” writes one.

“You’re getting screwed by some of the rats that slipped through the cracks,” writes another.

“I don’t take my cues from that Communist manifesto cue-taking media that is blinding the hearts and the minds of the lazy American who buys into their scheme,” writes a third.

“I am deeply sorry you are under attack again by those who are not willing to look themselves in the mirror but instead point fingers and try and bring you down from the greatness you have created,” writes a fourth.