Theater and Performing Arts
Are you trapped in a box, climbing a rope, struggling against a terrible wind? Would you like to be? If so, the Goldston Mime Foundation can help. This Chelsea studio offers mime and physical comedy courses. In these small classes, capped at 12 students, even those who long to vocalize can learn useful skills, such as creating a more powerful stillness, making your movements more musical, and making stronger exits and entrances. goldmime.com
Louis Armstrong declared, “If you have to ask what jazz is, you’ll never know.” Yet we suspect the instructors at the New York Jazz Academy will be pleased to explain it to you. With locations in Manhattan, Brooklyn, Queens, and Long Island, as well as an online option, the school offers instruction in instrumentation as diverse as saxophone, viola, vocals, drums, and harp. (Jazz harp? Awesome.) The school accepts beginners and advanced students, kids, teens, and adults. nyjazzacademy.com
Fashion
Aichmophobia, the fear of needles, affects perhaps 10 percent of Americans. Of course, most of them aren’t specifically afraid of sewing needles, but if this dread anxiety afflicts you and yet you long to make your own clothes, Sew New York can help. Laura McCracken, a Brooklyn Heights instructor with 25 years of experience, offers private and semi-private instruction in Basic Sewing 101, easing in even the most reticent students to the wonders of the sewing machine, as well as hand sewing and couture techniques. sewny.com
Is fast fashion way too slow for you? Is avant-garde couture not really avant enough? Is next season already passé? Maybe it’s time you started designing your own togs. You can learn how at Murray Hill’s Ashcan Studio of Art, with a four-session course in fashion design. And to transform those sketches and swatches into actual clothing, you can follow up with another four-session class in garment construction. ashcanstudio.com
Writing
Relatively few fiction writers have inspired pop songs, to say nothing of good pop songs, but Myla Goldberg has achieved this rare feat. And if she can inspire the Decemberists, perhaps she can inspire you, too. Over four Wednesday evenings in November and December, Goldberg, the author of Bee Season et al., will lead a Creative Boot Camp at the Center for Fiction in midtown. Classes will focus on craft and practice, and students will “get a handle on voice, character, pacing, and how to generate ideas.” centerforfiction.org
Art and Architecture
Astoria and Little Italy excepted, New York isn’t particularly Greco-Roman. Most of us don’t even wrestle. Nevertheless, midtown’s Institute of Classical Architecture and Art celebrates the classical tradition in our relatively recent metropolis, particularly in its architectural form. Upcoming fall courses and workshops include Architectural Rendering, Drawing the Tuscan Order, and a class devoted to reading the sizeable corpus of Leon Battista Alberti, including On the Art of Building in Ten Books. classicist.org
Just when you thought the creative class had been priced out of DUMBO to make way for artisanal cookies and high-rises, the Creatively WILD Art Studio has set up shop there. Is it gentrification stalemate? Fall classes at the studio include Beginning Portrait and Figure Painting, Beginning Drawing and Illustration, and Introduction to Oil Painting. And as long as you’re in the area, you can always celebrate that new canvas with a Jacques Torres hot chocolate. creativelywildartstudio.com
For Children and Teens
The rest of the world calls it football, but because we’ve saved that term for a sport played by burly men using their hands, we’ll go ahead and refer to this particular pastime as soccer. Many schoolchildren play it, and if you’d like to give yours a couple of legs up, you can enroll him or her in Soccer School, an indoor training facility at Upper 90 in Cobble Hill. Hour-long classes include warm-ups, games, drills, and tactical exercises. u90soccer.com
Mozart was crafting symphonies practically as soon as he could eat solids, Picasso sketching almost from the moment he could grasp a pencil. So why not start your own prodigy early with classes at Mini Hands in Williamsburg? The studio offers art and music classes for tots 18 months and older, as well as the chance to learn Mandarin, because it’s never too early to advance kiddies into the global economy. They also offer parties. myminihands.com
Film/Video
You could attempt to break into the movie biz by writing mash notes to famed directors, making the rounds of casting couches, or inventing a superior variety of popcorn. Or you could simply learn how to make great movies. The 12-week Evening Filmmaking course at the International Film Institute of New York in Riverdale focuses on four elements: writing for the screen, directing, production, and post-production. Students will emerge with a short film in HD. nyfilmschool.com
Food and Drink
Who could have predicted that a simple assemblage of flour, water, tomato, and cheese (maybe a little pepperoni if you’re feeling indulgent) could fuel an entire city? And surely if every corner pizzaiolo can manage it, you should be able to learn to make the wondrous stuff yourself at the Goodfellas Pizza School of New York on Staten Island. Designed for serious students, the school offers a five-day class, a two-week class incorporating management training, and the master class, which covers dessert pizza and calzone and forces students to roll 1,000 balls of dough. pizzaschoolnewyork.com
Oh, sure, you’ve had macaroons, those gooey coconut rounds that are perennial Passover favorites. But lose just one vowel and you have the macaron, the chic and airy French confection composed of two delicate meringues sandwiching jam or cream. These are dangerously addictive and expensive, so if you’d like to learn to feed your habit in a more thrifty fashion, consider a two-hour hands-on workshop at Cathcart & Reddy on the Lower East Side. The dessert emporium also offers instruction in the chocolate soufflé. desserttruck.wordpress.com
Health/Body/Wellness
Excepting the corpse flower and the sea onion, most plants possess astonishing beauty—and some might improve your own looks. At the New York Botanical Garden‘s Herbal Spa Workshop: A Natural Approach to Beautiful Skin, you can learn to make your own herbal clay masks, moisturizers, lip balm, skin toners, and foot scrubs. If inner beauty is more your speed, you can take the Herbal Preparations Workshop and learn how fresh and dried herbs are transformed into teas, decoctions, tinctures, and herbal oils. nybg.org
Chakra treatment! If you’re looking for a wholly holistic approach to wellness, Reflections Yoga in midtown offers regular classes in Restorative Yoga, which promises to engage “various Energy-Body-Mind Self-Healing Modalities” as well as breathwork and meditation. The studio also offers Naam Yoga, which focuses on healing processes, and the Tao of Health, Sex, and Longevity. reflectionsyoga.com
Computers
Samuel Johnson opined that “Many things difficult to design prove easy to perform.” Then again, Samuel Johnson never had to design a Web page or code in HTML5. But you might, and if you’re flummoxed by the prospect of such, Chelsea’s New York Code & Design Academy can likely offer some assistance. Their classes Web Design Fundamentals and Introduction to Web Design and Development will teach students to craft their own pages and mobile apps. nycda.com
For many of us, our media is far more social than we ourselves are, but if you’re a digital outcast, perhaps the popular clique at the Social Media School can help you out. In addition to an introduction to social media for business owners and individuals, this midtown school offers instruction in Facebook, Twitter, YouTube, blogging, LinkedIn, e-mail marketing, and even podcasting. A few meetings and you’ll be sitting at the cool kids’ table in no time—in cyberspace, anyway. socialmediaschoolny.com
Languages
Two popular Irish sayings insist, “Hear much and say little” and “An open mouth often catches a closed fist.” Honestly, they sound even better in Gaelic, so why not ignore these adages and begin to learn the Irish language? The Irish Arts Center, on the western edge of the theater district, offers many language classes, from introductory to advanced, as well as occasional free conversation opportunities. And just think how you’ll impress the next leprechaun you meet. irishartscenter.org
Crafts
Man is born free, Jean-Jacques Rousseau taught us, but is everywhere in chains. Yet some chains are nicer than others. (I’m partial to those slim silver ones especially.) You can learn to make some fine ones of your own when Pratt offers its four-day Jewelry Design Intensive I over two weekends in November. In addition to covering basic techniques, learning how to source materials, and establishing a library of resources, students will complete a bracelet, necklace, or pair of earrings. pratt.edu
Since the bedbug scare began, plucking furniture off the street is no longer the joy it used to be. In fact, your own furniture might be in need of refreshing, either for aesthetic or sanitary reasons. Happily, reupholstering fulfills both, and the Textile Arts Center in Park Slope offers a four-session class, Reupholstery 101, in November and December. Students will learn the arcana of “selecting, stretching, and tacking fabric” as well as various finishing methods. The center also offers open studio time to exercise this new textile knowledge. ssreg.com/textileartscenter
Sport
Urban life can make one fighting mad, but just because you feel enraged doesn’t mean you possess the requisite combat skills. Fortunately, the Anderson Martial Arts Academy can help, as this Soho studio offers regular instruction in self-defense (and, one assumes, offense) based on techniques drawn from Jeet Kune Do, Filipino martial arts, Muay Thai, Brazilian jiu-jitsu, mixed martial arts, wrestling, kickboxing, and standard boxing. For the particularly ticked off, there is also instruction in weaponry. andersonsmartialarts.com
Bikini season has long since passed. But just because there are fewer occasions to don a two-piece does not mean you should abandon your fitness goals. If you’d like to achieve them more quickly and you enjoy being disciplined by the perky, you can drag your spandex-clad self to Stacy’s Bootcamp. Rain or shine, these high-intensity classes are held in Central Park, Battery Park, and Washington Square Park. Bring weights, sneakers, water, and athletic gloves. stacysbootcamp.com
Nature
Flower arranging has a proud history dating back at least 4,500 years to the ancient Egyptians, who prepared elaborate floral designs for burial. So think of that next time you’re tempted to plunk a dozen roses from the corner deli into a water glass. (And don’t get us started on baby’s breath.) Chelsea’s Ovando can improve your petal prowess. This floral studio offers one-day workshops on various topics with drinks and snacks included. Upcoming course: Modern Thanksgiving Centerpieces. ovandony.com
Photography
If you ever, like Alice, are fortunate enough to fall down a magical rabbit hole, you should at least have the sense to snap a few photos of the resulting wonderland. Happily, DUMBO’s Rabbithole may be of some assistance. The gallery operates Brooklyn Central, which hosts eight-week courses in digital photography. But for those looking to take their snapshots with more alacrity, there are also three-hour workshops such as Crash Course: DSLR, Crash Course: Quick & Dirty Portraits, and iPhoneography 101. wearebrooklyncreative.com
Sure, these days everyone can take vacation snaps or cat photos and upload them to Facebook, Twitter, Photobucket, Flickr, Picasa, etc. But can they craft a daguerreotype? Well, chances are, neither can you, but those at midtown’s Center for Alternative Photography can and are willing to teach you how. The center has dedicated itself to preserving historical and emulsion-based photography, and its upcoming workshops include classes in wet plate, platinum, cyanotype, and, the week after Halloween, spirit photography. capworkshops.org
Miscellaneous
Do you believe in magic? The folks at Tannen’s do. Or so one hopes, as they’ve run a Herald Square magic shop since 1925. In addition to keeping the world supplied with trick decks and floppy wands, Tannen’s also offers lectures and classes. Fall talks include Hypnosis and Mind Reading, Muscle Reading, and new developments in card magic, as well as beginner’s classes in Coin Magic and Adult Magic, which sounds rather salacious. tannens.com