They’ll Bring the Lunacy, You Bring the Laughter

The raving psychopaths otherwise known as the Westboro Baptist Church — you know them, the cute and cuddly folks who protest U.S. soldiers’ funerals with lunatic rants about God hating fags, right? Well, they’re descending on our fair city over the next few days to blast their special brand of end-times crazy at the locals.

They’ll be protesting in front of Brooklyn Tech High School this afternoon and then at Congregation Beth Elohim and Union Temple in Park Slope and the Kane Street Synogogue on Saturday — the day before Yom Kippur.

So what brings Kansas’s most wacky export to such distant shores? According to a press release distributed by the group’s leader Shirley Phelps-Roper — who’s either the most batshit woman on the planet or the greatest performance artist since Andy Kaufman — the idea is to both ruin the Jewish New Year and just, you know, because we’re evil.

From the WBC’s website:

“Yo what’s up, God haters? Why you teach ‘It’s OK to be gay?’ WBC will be on hand to teach the rebels of Brooklyn what good looks like, and you had better behave. Not like this, but properly and appropriately.”

Adding to the gauntlet-throwdown is this little gem: According to Gothamist, when asked if she’s worried about a possible confrontation with the typically easy-going population of Brooklyn, Phelps said, “Don’t flatter yourself, Brooklyn. We serve the living God. You mess with us, you’ll get double destruction for what you do.”

You just gonna take that, Brooklyn? Look, we here at Runnin’ Scared would never recommend doing anything other than pointing and laughing at these people, but come on — you know you’ve always wanted to get them on your turf.

Bring a couple of sandwiches and your best elitist smirk and general New York attitude and make a day of it.