Hey man…yeah, we know it’s early, too. Are you seriously watching all of Star Trek: The Next Generation right now? Dude that’s crazy. Riker like, gets turned into a Klingon or some shit on one of those episodes, right? No, I’m good for right now, thanks. I have to work! But is there any pizza left? I’m so hungry. Yeah, I already checked on top of the the stove. The only thing there is a half-eaten Entenmann’s chocolate fudge cake, but I ate that already so it’s like, not a whole half anymore. Wait, a whole half? Whoa! That’s so confusing.
If you have ever had a conversation like this — come on, admit it, you just did! — you should probably leave your apartment for a little bit and get exposed to things like sunlight and true socialization. And don’t let those laws prohibiting pot deter you from bravely stepping forth into the real world: The Voice would never, ever advocate anything illegal, but Gov. Andrew Cuomo wants to decriminalize small amounts of marijuana. That wouldn’t apply to enjoying a joint out in the open, but in the spirit of reform, here’s our list of the best places to smoke weed in NYC.
In no particular order…
Central Park Sheep’s Meadow
“There’s supposed to be some historical stuff in this park, too” remarks a friend of the paper. Explains another via G-Chat: “i’ve taken acid and sat there for a solid 6 hours! Actually, the best way to see everything in central park is to smoke and get lost.”
East River Park
“This is the river where they always find bodies. In movies, at least…” Another friend mentions in a chat: “east river park, on the other hand, is easy to smoke in. just have to watch out for people sleeping.”
Because you can’t smell anything over the stench of backed up toilets…
Fort Greene Park’s Prison Ship Martyrs’ Monument
“It’s basically a chill lookout point.”
Bowery Ballroom Outdoor Smoking Area
Rock concerts happen here. What’s rock and roll without sex and drugs?
The Rocky Little Shore of Valentino Pier
For the romantic stoner in your life. (Duh.)
The Williamsburg Bridge
You can get high and look at the city’s skyline. Def a more bangable date option than taking your significant other to see What to Expect When You’re Expecting.
Men’s Bathroom in Tompkins Square Park
“The pungent smell of pee obliterates the cannabis odors.”
The Indian Caves in Inwood Hill Park
“The deer come down to the water to drink.”
Anywhere on The Campus of Pratt Institute, Brooklyn
Uhm, it’s an art school.
Says one Voice scribe: “i just got a one-hitter that looks like a cigarette. i walk down the street smoking weed pretty much every day.”
Follow Victoria Bekiempis @vicbekiempis.