Whether or not you’re planning on exercising your constitutional right to vote — or whether or not you’re even eligible to go to the polls — there’s definitely one way you can see democracy in action this Election Day afternoon. Just go to Twitter. The hashtag #ElectionDayPickupLines has been all over the socials today, giving every would-be comedian (or Casanova) a chance to spit his or her best patriotic double entendres to the masses. Here are some of the best we’ve seen so far:
#ElectionDayPickupLines You know how to vote, don’t you? You just grasp the base of the lever and pull.
— Teresa (@doctorwho_dat) November 4, 2014
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Women Nearly Absent From New York State Ballot
Girl, you’re as fine as a district line. #ElectionDayPickupLines
— Doc (@DocDarnell) November 4, 2014
I’m the candidate you should get behind #ElectionDayPickupLines
— Misty (@DaiseyDoesIt) November 4, 2014
“Hey baby, for this election, I’m supposed to show a photo ID. How’s this?” *Shows dick pic* #ElectionDayPickupLines
— Erik Bransteen (@erikbransteen) November 4, 2014
Is that a hanging chad or are you happy to see me? #ElectionDayPickUpLines
— The Fake Hatchet (@FakeHatchet) November 4, 2014
“I won’t start breaking promises until tomorrow.” #ElectionDayPickupLines
— Mad Cowford (@MadCowford) November 4, 2014
Baby, I put the ‘pork’ in pork-barrel politics.
— Dark Projectionist (@darkprojectnist) November 4, 2014
“I’m a rich, white guy.” #ElectionDayPickupLines
— Mad Cowford (@MadCowford) November 4, 2014
Our favorite, though, has to be the poor, passive-aggressive sap who tried to get some attention from ex-girlfriend and Hackensack native Yemi Miller-Tonnet. Dude quickly found his moves exposed like a hanging chad for all to see:
Ex boyfriends be like #ElectionDayPickupLines pic.twitter.com/QRpwlF5FDF
— ***Yemí (@yemi_isms) November 4, 2014
We checked in with Miller-Tonnet, who insisted the exchange was real. “It wasn’t too surprising that somebody would text me about voting,” she says, as she’s pretty politically involved, “but I thought it was pretty funny that he added the whole ex-boyfriend talk. I appreciated the creativity of it all.”
Now living in Georgia where she attends Spelman College, Miller-Tonnet already voted absentee for the race at home. She wants to remind people to vote if they still can.
Get yo ass to them poles!
— ***Yemí (@yemi_isms) November 4, 2014
Matter of fact….go to the strip club, fill your car with the strippers (get consent duh) and all y’all go to vote together.
— ***Yemí (@yemi_isms) November 4, 2014
Poles, polls….. No? Okay. Bye.
— ***Yemí (@yemi_isms) November 4, 2014