Bloomberg Foils Biden with Daring Swine Flu Subway Ride


Mayor Bloomberg rode the subway today and said he felt “perfectly safe.” Of course he does — he’s surrounded by bodyguards and, if attacked, can shoot deadly streams of money from his sleeves. But he meant from swine flu contamination — the trip, broadcast on local TV news, was evidently meant to counter Joe Biden’s begged-off allegation that subway travel might be a swine flu hazard for members of his family. The Mayor also told people not to PANIC, that we are “better off than we were yesterday,” and announced that the Casa Puebla Cinco de Mayo party in Flushing had been cancelled. Then everyone ran screaming for the exits.