Fourth of July Is On A Wednesday This Year!


This is absolutely horrible!

How are people going to get a long weekend out of July 4 if the actual holiday is in the middle of the week?

I suspect a lot of people will just take it as a vacation week and go away, but it’s silly to use a vacation week when you already have a day off in the middle of it. Use it to get five whole days off!

But even if they take it off, fine–what about everyone else?

Are we supposed to go away for a weekend, come home, go away again for that one day, come home, then go away again the next weekend?

That’s too much schlepping and the mere idea of it is ruining not just that week, but the whole summer!

And what will happen to the drag queen invasion on Fire Island, which always takes place on July 4?

Will they invade to absolutely no witnesses? Will it be a gussied-up cry in the forest?

I’m just beside myself!

We greedy capitalists have such awful leisure-time problems!