Flashback: Top 10 Career Moves for Judith Miller

A compassionate list for a reporter in limbo

Editor's note: As the fallout from the Plame Affair keeps showering down, the New York Times announced today that reporter Judith Miller has retired from the paper. As WNBC reported: She spent 85 days in jail over the summer for refusing to testify about her conversations with [Dick Cheney's Chief of Staff Scooter Libby]. But after her release, Miller was criticized harshly and publicly by Times editors and writers for her actions in the CIA leak case and for her reporting during the run-up to the Iraq war, later discredited, indicating that Saddam Hussein possessed weapons of mass destruction. Back in October, when her departure was still merely rumored to be on the way, contributor Jason Vest posted a few suggestions for what Miller could do with the rest of her life.


Top 10 Next Career Moves for Judith Miller
A compassionate list for a 'Times' reporter in limbo By Jason Vest

In the wake of both her release from jail and The New York Times' Sunday post-mortem, everyone's asking what's next for reporter Judith Miller. Some possibilities:

1. Becomes recipient of new Prisoner of Conscience Chair at American Enterprise Institute (endowed by Conrad Black and Richard Perle, using money from dubious Hollinger dealings); as a sideline, opens "Iraqi National Cafe" just outside AEI's Wohlstetter Auditorium with Laurie Mylroie

2. Founds First Amendment Center for Reporters Who are Covering for Government Sources Conspiring to Attack Whistleblowers

3. Incorporates Pedicures for Prisoners, an advocacy groups for the right of incarcerated elite journalists to get a little pampering while waiting for grand jury terms to expire

4. Writes series of books, including memoir (Guns, Germs and Steel Bars) and how-to book on subverting U.S. newspaper of record (Valerie Plame Has 99 Names)

5. Eventually, Lou Dobbs and others come to their senses and stop uncritically venerating her; backlash become so intense that she desires anonymity and, fondly recalling her run-in in Aspen with Scooter Libby, drifts out West and quietly finds work as rodeo clown

6. After Karen Hughes fails, becomes next Undersecretary of State for Public Diplomacy

7. Gets job offer to join crack fake-news team at "The Daily Show." (Memo to Jon Stewart: Watch your desk)

8. Prevails on Arthur Sulzberger and Bill Keller to change New York Times motto from "All The News That's Fit to Print" to "Whatever Miss Run Amok Thinks She Can Get Away With, We Run It"

9. Keller and Sulzberger decide to go head-to-head with CNN on media criticism; Discovery Times channel debuts "Reliable Sources with Judith Miller"

10. Keller and Sulzberger announce new job for Miller at Times: ombudsman

 
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