By Jared Chausow
By Katie Toth
By Elizabeth Flock
By Albert Samaha
By Anna Merlan
By Jon Campbell
By Jon Campbell
By Albert Samaha
So should we hate these guys or not?
Your call. Mormons may be lesser perverts than Catholics, and not nearly as mean as the Baptists. But if Romney declares martial law and forces you to get naked with a squadron of babushka ladies, don’t come whining to us. As Rev. Jeffress might counsel, the wise man always hates first and asks questions later – if only to stay on the right side of Jesus.
They may like black people, now, but they still have a very real problem, elsewhere. The verse, Mormon (7:5), states that Jesus Christ "was slain by the Jews", a sentiment that has caused Jews considerable grief, over the centuries. I have this recurring fantasy of Mitt Romney screaming at his sect's leader, "Don't you know that I'm running for office!?"
What a shallow piece utterly devoid of any original humor. Apparently you've been to Cleveland. How about Krakow? Oh, wait, I bet Trey Parker stole all your material. No wonder this rag can't give away copies anymore.
This article is hilarious, reads like it's right out of Die Sturmer!
You should be ashamed of your bigotry.
phucky u pete kotz n yr lowblow rips on cleveland. was that necessary? this is what remains of the voice writers? taking everyone and everything down in flames as it fades into irrelevance? are u even aware clevelanders built a huge chunk of manhattan and even today are a major source of funds for its museums and control its sports teams? aw never mind. you just better hope the #ows movement does not grow because they will be coming for rich entitled trustfund snobs like you first.
@Peter Gephardt I have lived in both. Seriously. And, I like Krakow better!
But come on now, it is ALL true. I'm from Upstate NY and Western NY originally: the documents showing Joseph Smith was found guilty of skrying (charging money conning people as a treasure seeker, using magic peep stones) do exist. The LDS church still has those peep stones and considers them to be religious relics--because Joseph Smith later used those peepstones to translate the Book of Mormon from the "golden plates" that the Angel Moroni took back with him when he went...wherever he went.
The Kirtland Anti-Banking Scandal did happen (since Joseph and minions were not legally allowed to call it a bank they called it an Anti-bank, lol); said anti-bank did in fact fail due to their greed and his mismanagement/taking of all the assets. He fled first, his buddies followed after--the other Mormons who got screwed were the ones who chased them away.
In Carthage jail, Joseph Smith drank liquor and had a revolver smuggled in to him--which he shot, when he and his buddy broke out of jail, killing two men in the mob/crowd who were there to lynch him. They were there to lynch him not because he was Mormon but because A) he committed treason by ordering the destruction of a printing press which had printed news of his crimes and misdeeds, and B) he committed bigamy and polygamy, then lied about it to his wife, and his church members, and to the US the government. They wanted him dead for another reason: he declared himself General of his own religious army, armed himself and his followers and massed up on the border and said they were going to come across, and anyone in their way be damned. He wanted a cult theocracy with himself at its head. He did not get it, but for a time, in Utah, Brigham Young did.
Brigham Young and his cronies made Brigham's adopted son John D Lee & company, take the fall for Mountain Meadows Massacre. They and their Lamanite/Indian friends ambushed and killed every man woman and child over the age of 8--then threw their bones into mass graves after wolves got to them first, and ripped them apart. THEN they billed the US government for the food and clothes of the children they took home with them. AFTER, of course, tithing 10% to Brigham Young, and sharing the rest among themselves. They took the supplies, money, food, farm implements and horses, and gave each other equal shares of the loot before giving some as payment to the Indians.
The temple oaths once required you to swear vengeance against the United States of America and her citizens, against all Gentiles, actually (to Mormons, Gentiles means all non Mormons) as the killers of Joseph Smith. THIS is why non Mormons hated them and were wary and fearful of them. NOT the fact that they were different or believed Joseph Smith was a prophet. The LDS church took the oaths out, except for the parts where the throat slitting and disemboweling motions are left in, and the words "suffer my own life to be taken" are remnants of same.