Tilda Swinton Gives Oscar Away! Agent Takes 100%!

Occasionally, the person who deserves an Oscar actually gets one, and that happened last night when Tilda Swinton copped Best Supporting Actress for Michael Clayton, in which she’s surreally shimmery, brilliantly slimy, and scarily good. Off screen, Tilda’s one of us—a spunky creative artist with a strong will and a radiant sense of quirk. In her speech, she said she’d give her trophy to her agent Brian Swardstrom, whom it physically resembles, and by time she greeted the press backstage last night, she said she’d already done so! A woman of her word? Who’s talented and individualistic and wears a one-armed glam rock shmatte? She’ll be drummed out of Hollywood in no time! But meanwhile, I’d love to meet Swardstrom. Even if he shares Oscar’s distinct lack of crotch, he’s got to have some mighty fine buttocks.