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Baby-Mama Drama and Deadbeat Dads

Cathy Middleton has become black radio's favorite expert on child support

During a recent 15-minute segment on Power 105's Ed Lover Morning Show, Cathy Middleton fields calls coming in on the jammed switchboard.

"She's our most popular guest outside of celebrity artists that come to the show," Jennifer Romero, a screener handling the calls says about Middleton, who is also a regular guest of Wendy Williams at WBLS and Michael Baisden on his syndicated show.

A woman named Melissa calls in to the show with a typical question: "My baby's father owes arrears," she says, "but I don't want to collect them because he has been doing really well in paying child support."

Now it's true that Middleton has a book called Girl, Get That Child Support: The Baby Mama's Guide to Tracking Down a Deadbeat, Finding His Cash and Making Him Pay Every Dollar He Owes You, but she's actually less one-sided than the title implies. Middleton has not only helped hundreds of women track down their deadbeat baby daddies, but she's also helped men get out from under onerous demands from their baby mamas. It's the babies that matter, and sometimes, she argues, a baby mama should consider being more lenient than a court of law.

Middleton explains to Melissa that under federal law, arrears can't be waived by Family Court. "The only person who can is you. Go down to the court and file paperwork to have his arrears waived."

Next up is a father named Terrence: "Do I get to stop paying child support when my kid turns 18—or 21?"

Middleton explains that it depends what his child is up to: "In New York State, you are no longer liable at age 18 if they are no longer in school and are economically independent, working," she says. "It is 21 if they are in college or still in school."

A woman named Laura gets through next: "If the father gets married, does his wife's income factor into my child-support payment? I know he's making more money, and now I have to pay $300 a month for health insurance."

Sorry, Laura—your baby daddy's new squeeze isn't responsible for her new husband's existing children. In fact, the game changes if the new couple start having babies of their own, Middleton explains. "Now, if he and his wife have a child, they have every right to go to court and have the judgment modified down. It sounds like you need to call me."

And that's just what many of Ed Lover's listeners do after Middleton leaves the studio. After a typical radio appearance, she gets about 50 calls from people inquiring into her legal services. And those potential clients are what make the trip to the studio worth it—even when she used to set out at 5 a.m. on the two-hour drive from Long Island to Philadephia for her regular appearances on a radio station there. The trip downtown to Power 105 is much easier.

Middleton says that her firm, Middleton & Middleton, grossed $105,000 last year with a caseload that is 90 percent child-support and custody matters. "It's a decent living," says the 39-year-old, who gives the impression she'd be happy with less: She doesn't wear flashy jewelry, doesn't have a cell phone (she has yet to replace the one she lost), wears sensible shoes, and has her hair pulled back into a bun. And there's no diva attitude.

Middleton & Middleton is a firm of one: Her sister, who was her partner, died of cancer a decade ago, but Middleton still says "we." She has one assistant and spends three days a week meeting with clients in her storefront office in the Laurelton section of Queens, where she grew up. Next-door is a day-care center owned by her parents, and across the street is an annex to the day care, which is run by another sister, a teacher. The comedian Chris Rock is her first cousin, though they aren't close. Middleton attended Temple Law School, and her husband is a lawyer as well. (They have one child.)

She's been practicing law for 15 years, but about six years ago, she saw a growing demand in the area of child-support law. "The number of child-support cases was increasing, and the larger society didn't realize this was a major breakdown in our family structure, especially within the African-American family. Seventy percent of black children are born out of wedlock," she says.

Business grew by word of mouth, as frustrated parents unclear about how the system worked began to find her. And now she's a budding radio star who is also in talks for appearances on the TV shows of Dr. Phil and ex–Jerry Springer bouncer Steve Wilkos.

"Everybody either has a child, is dating someone who has a child by another partner, or is related to someone who is going through it. In my case, my brother is going through child-support issues, so I see it," says Sarah O'Conner, the producer who books her for Ed Lover's show. "Cathy is very informative on how the law is designed and how it varies from state to state."

Middleton herself admits to being drawn to the drama of Family Court. "I'll admit I'm nosy, and I like to know what's going on in people's lives ever since I was a little kid. But when you're in my position, you see that most of this can be resolved if people just communicated."

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  • LOOKINGFORGEORGEKRISTINSSON 03/22/2011 3:10:00 AM

    HAVE YOU SEEN THIS PEDIATRICIAN? GEORGE KRISTINSSON,M.D. EMPLOYER: NYU LANGONE MEDICAL CENTER LAST KNOWN ADDRESS: 210 LAFAYETTE ST. 5F NY, NY 10012 DOB: 05/30/1966 •GEORGE MUST BE SERVED COURT PAPERS TO ESTABLISH PATERNITY AND BEGIN PROCEEDINGS TO HAVE HIM PAY CHILD SUPPORT. •PLEASE HELP ME FIND GEORGE FOR OUR DAUGHTER’S SAKE AND WELL-BEING. CONTACT: 347.674.4383 lookingforgeorgekristinsson@gmail.com

  • Dr. Rebecca Emens 05/09/2010 4:15:00 AM

    Is there not a support group or legal advocate for men who have faced an unfair ruling by the mothers' of their children? These men have been railroaded "RAPED" by the legal system based on the mothers' of their own children. What do we do???? Every few months (based on lies I know SHE told in court) my brother is required to come up with thousands of dollars to stay out of jail because she says he hasn't paid child support. The amount owed goes BACK YEARS. She originally said that he (my brother) has NEVER SUPPORTED his children and that she and the two girls have NEVER lived with my brother. That is a bold faced lie!!!! However, the courts (Judge & Department of Human Services) bought the lies "hook line and sinker." It makes me sick because every two or three months (even after she has returned from a cruise) decides she needs a couple thousand dollars! At such time she complains and a warrant is sworn out for my brothers' arrest. It is up to my family, (my 80 year old mother) to come up with the money to keep my brother out of jail. My brother lays concrete and when it rains can't work. He lives in a trailor, as does my mother. This has been going on since my brother's (ex-girl friendship - common law wife) left him for another man. Oh, by the way she was pregnant with another man's children (twins). Her statement in court was that she NEVER lived with my brother, which was in fact a lie. I have a video tape of my neice just after her birth in my brother's home. Yet, she goes on to have another child by the man she claims she has had one kid with and yet, never lived with!!!!! HOW DO WE FIND JUSTICE FOR SUCH MEN who have been raped by the Justice System based on the word of one woman?????? Do the courts not realize that women lie and do so even in spite of the fact that it hurts their children and the families of their children!!!! THERE ARE NOT AS MANY DEAD BEAT DADS' OUT THERE AS THERE ARE WOMEN ABUSING MEN!!!!! How do we stop this injustice????

  • Kevin Hamilton 12/28/2008 7:49:00 PM

    Hi Cathy, congrats on your books we have purchase your first book my wife read it and passed it on to a few friends we hope they contact you.Have you heard anything on my case lately? Email me some info. Kevin Hamilton.

  • Christina M. Blake 12/05/2008 5:58:00 AM

    So what do you do when your ex lies under oath during his financial depostion states he only works part time and is off the books? How do you get the courts to increase the child support?

  • Tammy 10/10/2008 11:57:00 PM

    www.downwithdeadbeats.com Thank you, Tammy

  • Demobeat 09/13/2008 7:28:00 AM

    I'm a custodial father, and like most that I know I get very little support. The law is still extremely sexist in every way. Men are labeled deadbeats when they never wanted any kids at all. I didn't, but when my wife decided to leave, I refused to lay down for it. I fought the court system and got custody. Of course, I got no support for three years and she never once got arrested. Women like this who harp on Deadbeats are missing the REAL deadbeat, the woman who wanted to live like a princess and dodge all accountability for the rest of her life via offspring. I fight every day to convince men to take their kids. You have the Job. You have the Support. Kick her to the Curb and take the kids. Deadbeat women are the biggest symptom of Feminazi politics that have this country in a deathgrip. Anyone who wants to be shocked beyond belief should read the UN resolution "CEDAW" which categorically denies men any parenting rights. Women are not better parents. Most women collecting support spend it on themselves. I got so little for so many years, starting at a mere 200 a month after 3 years of nothing, that I've had no choice but to spend every penny on them. But, I meet women driving new BMWs that have no job, shop all day at the mall, and their ratty dirty brats are in tow. The best summary of my impression of the female parenting abilities is a woman who came to our bank in Cali with her four diapered, dirty, sick barefoot children in tow. She wore dirty stained Kmart clothing. She filled out a new account slip and transferred $120,000.00 from her bank in Tenn. I see this sort of thing everywhere. Children are nothing but a way to a man's wallet to most women. Getting divorced? File for custody. Today's courts have women judges who are more likely to let a man have his kids, especially when the mother is a flat out deadbeat. Who do you see in the malls all day long? Women. Men have jobs, and better things to do than just shop for ourselves. We like to spend time with our kids at a park.

  • Larry 09/10/2008 7:03:00 PM

    There is an inaccuracy in the article. In New York, the amount of child support is calculated based on the total household income and not just that of the non-custodial parent. The non-custodial parent then pays an amount equal to the percentage that their income contributed to the total household income based on the tax returns for the 2 years prior to the divorce. Also, if one of the parents remarries they are certainly entitled to petition the court to have the amount of child support from a previous marriage reduced. But the general attitude by the courts is that if you can't afford to have a child with your new spouse while paying child support for children of a previous marriage then you have no business having additional children. Disclaimer: I am not a lawyer or involved in any way with the legal profession.

  • Rich Morrison 09/10/2008 6:39:00 PM

    I am the program supervisor for an electronic house arrest program in Wake County, North Carolina. Non-custodial parents, who are delinquent in making their child support payments, are frequently placed on electronic house arrest as a sanction for their violation of the court's order. This allows the offender to leave his home only for work. The judge in Raleigh, NC who started this program is the Honorable Kristin Ruth.

 

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