When I was a child, St. Patrick’s Day was one of my least favorite holidays, mainly because I always forgot to wear green, so all the other children would pinch me. (OK, they did that to me anyway.) How times change. Now nobody cares if you’re wearing green, so long as you’re drunk. People who want the big club experience and the big club DJ on St. Paddy’s Day, without the big club, should head to Lee Burridge’s gig at the relatively cozy Canal Room. Thursday @ 10, Canal Room, 285 W Bway, 212-941-8100

Brothers Luke and Liam May are Medicine8, a south London house production duo that pumps out sweet dancefloor jams that are funky, uplifting, soulful, and rich. In other words, no blips and bleeps here. They are playing with local jock Hiro at the latest installment of CON-FU-SION. Friday @ 10, Sullivan Room, 218 Sullivan, 212-252-2151

The battle between rock and techno is only second to the battle between the sexes. Fortunately, techno artist Gregory Shiff has decided to settle the score with three punks who think they can beat techno, I Love You (I mean, what kind of pussy-ass name is that? And it’s gonna take three of them. Losers). They square off with each playing a song meant to beat the other one down. Maybe you’ll enjoy it too. Friday @ 10, Rothko, 116 Suffolk, no phone

I’m only endorsing this party because of its name: MY GIRLFRIEND LEFT ME FOR A HIPSTER. For that alone, you should give these people money. They’ll be playing rock, but not wimpy Strokes bull-crap. Just some good ‘ol AC/DC, Lynyrd Skynyrd, and Van Halen. We can get down with that. Wednesday @ 10, Rothko, 116 Suffolk, no phone