Songs About Going Down on Celebrities Not So Simple


Upon repeatedly listening to the deceptively simple Pony Up! ode to ’80s male stardom “Matthew Modine,” I became convinced that I could construct a similarly gleaming indie-pop gem without much fuss. I figured I could easily mimic Pony Up!’s idol worship: kicky naughtiness like “Oh Matthew Modine/We want to be your blowjob queens,” sung in high-pitched, girlish yelps and layered over ’50s girl-group ooohs and ahhhhs and “Surfin’ Bird” papa-oom-mow-mows. After several unsuccessful attempts at rhyming “Cusack” and “nut sack,” I gave up on fabricating such whimsical excitement.

Their schoolyard chanting and over-the-top estrogen level make these five Montreal ladies a bit of a one-trick Pony. But their self-titled EP sports an unparalleled glockenspiel-backed exuberance that outlasts its throwaway lyrical content. The band says it best in the opening track: “If I left you wouldn’t miss me/I don’t care shut up and kiss me.” I’d love a couple of make-out sessions with Pony Up!, but I doubt I’m ready for a long-term relationship.