PSBklyn, with its dearth of vowels and surfeit of arcade games and tableside TV screens, was hailed upon its recent opening Park Slope as the apotheosis of child-friendly dining, a place where offspring could run wild as their parents consumed tasteful gastropub fare. An almost identical scenario, of course, plays out at most Park Slope restaurants daily, regardless of how child-friendly they actually are, but PSBklyn seems to be the first to actively encourage children to literally bounce off the walls and their parents to ignore them. Which made us wonder: Just how intolerable is it for the unwitting, possibly child-averse diner who chooses to eat there?
Fortunately, Fucked in Park Slope has provided us with some answers. The children’s section, the blog discovered, is “like a combination of Two Boots at 12pm on Sunday, multiplied by a class at Kidville, divided by the Park Slope Halloween Parade and then multiplied again by the number of pages in Amy Sohn’s book.” Even if you’re seated up front in the non-kid’s section, “the noise level and commotion throughout the rest of the joint” are still pretty intense. All in all, “the kid factor there is no joke. So def proceed with caution.”
Also, there seem to be some service issues. But there’s that arcade. It’s subterranean and unsupervised, allowing parents to maintain the blissful if temporary illusion that they’ve sent their children to a sort of benevolent dungeon. And for that reason alone, PSBklyn will likely be a hit, no matter how many times the waitstaff bungles an order or tries to pass off fish paste on a cracker as an ahi tuna appetizer.