Hi, I'm Brittany, and I'm Rotting!

Rachel Arieff, dressed in jeans and a hairnet, steps onto the stage and into character. "They should make a sitcom about my life!" she squeals. There was that hilarious time she spilled coffee all over her boss, and then that time she sat in cat pee, and "this constant feeling I'm going to be disemboweled and forced to eat my own entrails— what's that all about?!"

One might well make a sitcom about Arieff's life, but a sweeter one than her character proposes. Arieff met husband Bob Powers at Collective Unconscious and married him at the bar next door. Now, every Saturday, they perform one- person shows there. The couple shares more than a marriage bed: each of their plays is episodic in nature, possesses a Kids in the Hall vibe, and has some weaknesses in the writing salved with strong performances.

In I'm Brittany, Arieff takes on "career girls in decay"— literally. Brittany's decomposing, Nancy's covered in blood, and would-be actress Missy must be hurting, having fucked every man in New York who claims to have been on Conan. Powers's Blood details life's losers: the working stiff propositioned by his decrepit boss, the umbrella-wielding pervert, the guy who just can't remember he's legless ("Like I call up and say, 'Hey, I wanna join your soccer team.' And then they say, 'Do you have any legs?' ").

While the scripts need polishing and each show has a piece or two crying to be cut, Powers and Arieff form a talent family all the same.

André Ernotte Memorial

A memorial celebrating the life and work of the acclaimed director André Ernotte will be held at 4 p.m. on Monday, May 10, at the Vineyard Theatre, 108 East 15th Street.