Stuff You Need to Know to Avoid Cultural Ostracism

 Unrequested Reunions
Rage Against the Machine rise again to headline Coachella.
Please be advised that this band has aged about as well as a plate of General Tso's chicken left in the back seat of a Hyundai stranded on the side of the road in Death Valley for 10 years. Cooooooooah! Bring that shit in!

Innovative Anti-Piracy Stratagems
Promo copies of the new El-P record that actually say, "This promo belongs to ______" throughout to discourage file-sharing.
Two thoughts: (a) This is actually quite splendid, and (b) learn to pronounce my name.

Transcendent Concert Experience
Oneida's euphorically endless jam on "Up With People," the highlight of their slot in a totally sweet three-band bill sandwiched between Mission of Burma and Parts & Labor at Irving Plaza last Friday night.
Brooklyn art rock now has its very own "Truckin'."

Journalistic Coup
Ben Fong-Torres drops the anonymously sourced bombshell that the I'm From Rolling Stone combatants were chosen by criteria other than their journalistic acumen.
Oh, now that's just ridiculous.

Internet Debacle
Reminiscing about how much funnier this whole "List of Every Gay Band Ever" thing was before it turned out to be a hoax by some so-offensive-I'm-satirizing-offensive-people douchebag actor.
Those were the days (i.e., last Monday and Tuesday).

Culinary Intrigue
Our abrupt and unwelcome obsession with Dunkin Donuts' peanut butter cookies.
This is going to be a problem.

 
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