Rex Is Comedy

Dismissing Park Chanwook's Oldboy in The New York Observer, Rex Reed soberly indicts Korean food: "What else can you expect from a nation weaned on kimchi, a mixture of raw garlic and cabbage buried underground until it rots, dug up from the grave and then served in earthenware pots . . . ?" Online forums erupted in protest, but Reed's bold attempt to bridge food and film reviewing is hardly new. Research reveals that the cosmopolitan critic has previously blamed other exotic dishes for the collapse of various national cinemas.

On Spirited Away: "No surprise coming from a people raised on chicken katsudon, an incestuous gang bang of murdered poultry and aborted chicks—the former cooped up in cramped cages, wading in their own feces."

On Y Tu Mamá También: "Par for the course for a country loco for chimichangas, a queasy heap of shredded flesh, mummified in corn torn from the ground and then mercilessly pummeled flat—before being tortured in a bath of hot oil."

On Amélie: "C'est la vie for a race responsible for croque monsieurs, a nauseating farrago of flayed pig muscle and fermented cow extract, imprisoned in a tomb of scorched bread, the whole thing drowned with béchamel sauce."