The Trouble With Romance Hosts a Roaring Void of Talent

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The Trouble With Romance
Directed by Gene Rhee
Opens February 27, Quad Cinema

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One hotel, one night, four couples (with their sundry third and fourth wheels—all involved parties loathsome), and four skits involving troubled relationships, conjoining O. Henry twisteroos, and Spencer's Gifts ribaldry. Herein, one can see some dude blast diarrhea on a picture of his ex-girlfriend, bogus girl-girl softcore involving a former 90210 actress, and several of the worst soul-baring monologues ever written. Imdb.com says the cast in director Gene Rhee's The Trouble With Romance has been steadily employed, but they could easily have been replaced by anyone in the herd of semi-hot SoCal hangabouts put out of work by the cancellation of Blind Date or the cutbacks in the Saddle Ranch Chop House waitstaff. The roaring void of talent doesn't stop there. Trouble's soundtrack was evidently programmed by a random soggy-poignant relationship pop generator. The chief cinematographic achievement is finding creative ways to shoot around tits, adding to the air of blushing suggestiveness that one wouldn't think could still find an adult audience in the age of easy-and-anonymous online wank mining. References to Michael Jordan as an active player and the grating overuse of the term "homies" further make one strongly suspect the script was completed in 1995. Can a movie get some "at least we tried" low-budget pity points, man? Move back home, all of you.

 
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